Short Thoughts on Long Nails

David Foster Wallace, from
David Foster Wallace, from “Although Of Course You End Up Becoming Yourself.” Highly recommended.

I never thought I’d be the kind of woman with long nails. Growing up, I bit my nails to the quick. It took hard work and a couple years, but I finally broke free from the nervous habit by keeping my nails painted. Jagged edges were my trigger, so I put a glass nail file in my bag for easy touch ups.

Miracle in a bottle.
Miracle in a bottle.

One product took my nails from short and round to long and oval: Duri Rejuvacote. Two years ago I was perfectly happy using Nailtiques, but Rejuvacote delivers much faster results. I’m planning on cutting my nails short tonight; removing my contacts is getting dicey. But it’s nice to know that I can grow them back out quickly, if the femme fatale yearning overcomes me once again.

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Music and Makeup: Love Like a Sunset Nails Inspired by Phoenix

sunset ombre nails
Here comes a visible horizon, right where it starts and ends

Two of the most beautiful shows I’ve been to this year were the same band: Pheonix’s triumphant performances at Coachella and Outside Lands. It’s hard for me to pick which set was better, but I’ll lean toward Coachella for the favorable weather and the impact of seeing it the first time.

Phoenix has one of the simplest yet most moving visuals I’ve seen. At the front of the stage white lights illuminated the band through the mist of a fog machine. Behind Phoenix was a huge LED screen that shifted between solid colors: blood red to stark black to bright aqua to lime green to wild magenta in quick succession. Here’s an clip of the show. It’s worth it to watch straight through, but if you want to skip ahead, the light show gets crazy beginning at 2:48.

[SEIZURE WARNING: intense flashing lights ahead]

Remembering this set fondly, I decided to do a sunset manicure inspired by the song. Luckily for klutzes like me, this is a very simple look: all you need are three shades of polish and a makeup sponge.

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Nail Art for Klutzes: Nude Glitter Manicure

nude glitter nails
Cat sighting!

Remember that nude manicure from the interview makeup tutorial? I wanted to glam them up a bit, and I thought I’d try something new. I love the look of metallic glitter over nude polish – it’s flashy but also chic.

Best of all, glitter polish I used is on sale! Sephora is ending its Sephora by OPI line, which is a shame since I really like all of the polishes I’ve tried from that line. But the upside is everything is currently 50% off, so take advantage it before they are all gone!

Keep reading to see the super easy (two step!) manicure process. Totally klutz-friendly.

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Nail Art for Klutzes: Art Deco Manicure

art deco mani
Literal pearl clutching

I’ve always been fascinated with the Art Deco movement. Bold geometric shapes, strong colors, exuberant luxury, what’s not to love? When I was in middle school I participated in a contest where you had to represent an art movement on a hat. I chose Art Deco, and built a Chrysler Building model that I put on top of a top hat with the brim surrounded in pearls and a pink boa. Just as ridiculous as it sounds, but I won the competition!

chrysler building manicure
Imagine this on a top hat surrounded by pearls and a pink boa. Yep.

 

Thinking back to that hat inspired this much more subtle take on the Art Deco aesthetic. And best of all, this is nail art that even klutzes like me won’t screw up. Don’t worry if you can’t paint a straight line – check out the tutorial below!

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Argh My Nails Creased! How to Avoid This Stupidly Common Phenomenon

Yes, that's in front of a toilet. Because these nails are poop.
Yes, they’re in front of a toilet. Because these nails are poop.

Here’s the story: you’re trapped in a Top of the Lake marathon, unable to peel away from the amazingness that is Peggy Olsen with a New Zealander’s accent and Holly Hunter’s silver wig. And suddenly, you have inspiration for some new nail art. Now is the perfect time to try out that metallic sharpie nail art from Lauren Conrad’s surprisingly useful beauty website.

But! It’s 10 p.m. And you’ve had a couple Red Tail Ales. And you really should go to bed within an hour. But for the sake of nail art, you press on. Caution! Here be dragons. Specifically, the dragon that is waking up in the morning with creases all over your gorgeous nails. I’m going to teach you the steps you need to prevent this from ever happening again.

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Manicure Mondays: Two-Tone Metallic Scotch Tape Tutorial

metallic manicure
I love rose gold and silver together

My order of three nail polishes from Zoya has arrived, and I’m so happy with them so far. I usually go for the cheapest nail polish possible, but when I saw their crazy “3 nail polishes free (just pay S&H)” deal, I had to take advantage of it.

One shade I’ve been eyeing for a long time is Faye, which Zoya describes as “a bronzed mauve with purple and brown undertones flooded with bright gold sparkle.” I’d call it a rose gold, which shifts between gold and pink in the sunlight. Check out some swatches here.

I wore the shade on its own for a few days, but when I noticed some tip wear, I wanted to extend the look. An easy solution? Adding a contrasting french tip. I love the look of mixed metals, so I decided to choose an opaque silver.

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New Years Nails: Blue with Silver Glitter Half Moons

Party Ready
Party Ready

I wanted to try a new look for New Years. To me, new years style means, dark shades and glitter glitter glitter. But because I usually wear an all-over glitter shade, I wanted something a little more detailed and special. I decided to adapt the Beauty Department’s New Years Nails article with some of my own style.

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